I'm afraid that what I am won't ever be enough.
Thursday, January 26, 2006
Wednesday, January 25, 2006
With every breath, with every thought
From what is seen to the deepest part
I offer all that I've come to be
To know your love fathering me
Father You're all I need
My soul's sufficiency
My strength when I am weak
That love that carries me
Your arms enfold me, till I am only
A child of God
With every step on this journey's walk
And wisdom's songs that the soul has sought
I give myself unreservedly
To know Your love fathering me
From what is seen to the deepest part
I offer all that I've come to be
To know your love fathering me
Father You're all I need
My soul's sufficiency
My strength when I am weak
That love that carries me
Your arms enfold me, till I am only
A child of God
With every step on this journey's walk
And wisdom's songs that the soul has sought
I give myself unreservedly
To know Your love fathering me
Sunday, January 22, 2006
I've alluded to this in a few other posts, but I love having my sisters back!!!! I love watching their faces light up, listening to their squels...
And slightly off topic, I enjoy being able to dream about ways to show love to people again.
And slightly off topic, I enjoy being able to dream about ways to show love to people again.
Friday, January 20, 2006
how do you like my new look?
it was time for a change.
God's been working a lot in my life recently, bringing up old sins and wounds of the past to be forgiven and cast into the depths. Terribly painful, but oh how wonderful when i'm freed from it!
The more i sit here working on my senior paper, the more i am fed up with academia and want to be out. Out where the people are (my single is synomous with solitary confinement), out where I can love people, serve them. Out where i can take risks and persue the Lord in open fields. I was reminded once again reading a xanga post that i am called abroad, to where his people do not know him. Missions, perhaps. but not in the church-planting/exploit africa sense. more like roll-up my sleeves and be amongst the people, loving them, working with and equipping them to fulfill their needs.
it was time for a change.
God's been working a lot in my life recently, bringing up old sins and wounds of the past to be forgiven and cast into the depths. Terribly painful, but oh how wonderful when i'm freed from it!
The more i sit here working on my senior paper, the more i am fed up with academia and want to be out. Out where the people are (my single is synomous with solitary confinement), out where I can love people, serve them. Out where i can take risks and persue the Lord in open fields. I was reminded once again reading a xanga post that i am called abroad, to where his people do not know him. Missions, perhaps. but not in the church-planting/exploit africa sense. more like roll-up my sleeves and be amongst the people, loving them, working with and equipping them to fulfill their needs.
Thursday, January 19, 2006
(taken from a friend's live journal)
Best of 2005
1. Living with Marija and Nadine (and Div)
2. Knowing what to do after graduation
3. Times spent with my crazy IVCF girls
4. Striker
5. Spending a few days on Camden St.
Worst of 2005
1. Character flaws of last summer
2. Amherst courses
3. Depression
4. Brilliant sailing moments
5. Misunderstandings with a couple people
name four bad habits you have:
1. overcommittment (well, kinda...)
2. wanting the future to come/not enjoying the present
3. silence on things that really matter
4. thinking too much!
name four things that you wish you had:
1. job (long story, ask and i'll tell)
2. fluency in Russian
3. better relationships with some family members
4. roommates
name four scents you love:
1. rain!!!
2. barn: horses + hay
3. honeysuckle
4. musk
name four people that know you the best:
1. Lynds
2. Ad
3. Kim/Linds
4. Marija
name four things you hardly wear:
1. swim suits
2. dresses
3. jewelry (except earrings)
4. revealing clothing
name four things you are thinking about right now:
1. WA
2. Germany
3. God
4. people
name four things that you have done today:
1. worked on my senior project
2. talked to Lynds
3. dinner with the IVCF girls
4. read some
name the last four things you have bought:
1. posters
2. stuff for my door
3. food
4. books (Alcott, Emerson, Thoreau)
name four people you would like to spend more time with:
1. Lynds
2. Ad/Kim/Anne
3. My roomies
4. Camden St. people
name four bands/groups most people don't know you like:
1. Benjamin Gate
2. Doris Day and Patsy Cline (and pretty much anything else from the 40s and 50s)
3. Dulcimer music
4. Floyd Cramer
four drinks you regularly drink:
1. tea
2. water
3. VitaWater
4. orange juice
name the last four people you have kissed/been kissed by:
1. Tolu
2. Izckra
3. Emma
4. Tomi (not half as sketchy as it sounds. Promise.)
name four random facts about yourself:
1. i love night
2. i never wear gold jewelry
3. i have the Bible in 3 languages
4. My favorite flowers are honeysuckle and jasmine
Best of 2005
1. Living with Marija and Nadine (and Div)
2. Knowing what to do after graduation
3. Times spent with my crazy IVCF girls
4. Striker
5. Spending a few days on Camden St.
Worst of 2005
1. Character flaws of last summer
2. Amherst courses
3. Depression
4. Brilliant sailing moments
5. Misunderstandings with a couple people
name four bad habits you have:
1. overcommittment (well, kinda...)
2. wanting the future to come/not enjoying the present
3. silence on things that really matter
4. thinking too much!
name four things that you wish you had:
1. job (long story, ask and i'll tell)
2. fluency in Russian
3. better relationships with some family members
4. roommates
name four scents you love:
1. rain!!!
2. barn: horses + hay
3. honeysuckle
4. musk
name four people that know you the best:
1. Lynds
2. Ad
3. Kim/Linds
4. Marija
name four things you hardly wear:
1. swim suits
2. dresses
3. jewelry (except earrings)
4. revealing clothing
name four things you are thinking about right now:
1. WA
2. Germany
3. God
4. people
name four things that you have done today:
1. worked on my senior project
2. talked to Lynds
3. dinner with the IVCF girls
4. read some
name the last four things you have bought:
1. posters
2. stuff for my door
3. food
4. books (Alcott, Emerson, Thoreau)
name four people you would like to spend more time with:
1. Lynds
2. Ad/Kim/Anne
3. My roomies
4. Camden St. people
name four bands/groups most people don't know you like:
1. Benjamin Gate
2. Doris Day and Patsy Cline (and pretty much anything else from the 40s and 50s)
3. Dulcimer music
4. Floyd Cramer
four drinks you regularly drink:
1. tea
2. water
3. VitaWater
4. orange juice
name the last four people you have kissed/been kissed by:
1. Tolu
2. Izckra
3. Emma
4. Tomi (not half as sketchy as it sounds. Promise.)
name four random facts about yourself:
1. i love night
2. i never wear gold jewelry
3. i have the Bible in 3 languages
4. My favorite flowers are honeysuckle and jasmine
Thursday, January 05, 2006
I meant to blog this yesterday, but the charm of Mary Poppins enticed me to do otherwise.
I had a wonderful break, blah blah blah, BUT i did get to see LOTR for the first (!) time and also Narnia... furthermore, I got to spend New Year's with friends, which is *far* better than celebrating with my parents and then going to sleep before midnight (which describes the past couple years). So that rocked.
Now for a rant:
Where are the prophets? Where are the people who speak in tounges? Why is it that Matt 10 isn't being lived out by most christians (incl. myself).... according to my interpertation of the Bible and experiences, I believe that the Lord is not just talking figuratively, but in ernst.
Considering how radically lives have been changed by Christ in my church, it would seem like those types of things would happen there... yet they don't. But they happen in obscure places in WA, so they must still be happening somewhere around the world. I'm not content with just experiencing God's goodness and mercy on a shallow? trite? level, I want to experience the power, the fullness of the stuff God has promised us here on earth...
Has our intellectualism, of God, of the Bible, of things unseen, of science, removed the need and the thirst for acts of his power? has our triteness, our contentness for less than we can be given, sold us short of something so amazing here on earth that we can't keep it to ourselves? Has our deafness, caused by relativitism and individualism kept us from hearing the word of God spoken though the prophets or even his voice?
Lord I believe, help me to overcome my disbelief!!!
I had a wonderful break, blah blah blah, BUT i did get to see LOTR for the first (!) time and also Narnia... furthermore, I got to spend New Year's with friends, which is *far* better than celebrating with my parents and then going to sleep before midnight (which describes the past couple years). So that rocked.
Now for a rant:
Where are the prophets? Where are the people who speak in tounges? Why is it that Matt 10 isn't being lived out by most christians (incl. myself).... according to my interpertation of the Bible and experiences, I believe that the Lord is not just talking figuratively, but in ernst.
Considering how radically lives have been changed by Christ in my church, it would seem like those types of things would happen there... yet they don't. But they happen in obscure places in WA, so they must still be happening somewhere around the world. I'm not content with just experiencing God's goodness and mercy on a shallow? trite? level, I want to experience the power, the fullness of the stuff God has promised us here on earth...
Has our intellectualism, of God, of the Bible, of things unseen, of science, removed the need and the thirst for acts of his power? has our triteness, our contentness for less than we can be given, sold us short of something so amazing here on earth that we can't keep it to ourselves? Has our deafness, caused by relativitism and individualism kept us from hearing the word of God spoken though the prophets or even his voice?
Lord I believe, help me to overcome my disbelief!!!
